Comments on: Tacit Approval: Don’t you dare give it!

By: Talking Story: You can’t “Be fair.” Be consistent

Talking Story: You can’t “Be fair.” Be consistent — Wed, 16 Feb 2011 10:16:27 +0000

Striving for fairness when you’re managing can really be a losing battle. You can’t accurately define fairness unless the people in a squabble are operating with exactly the same set of values —and the same hierarchy of value driving relevance. Chances…

By: Rosa Say

Rosa Say — Sat, 14 Nov 2009 01:27:41 +0000

Aloha Fred, thank you for sharing that story. It is fairly common, and I’ll bet there are several readers nodding their heads right now in a recollection of some kind!

Confrontation is hard for all of us, but there is always a respectful, to the point, helpful way to approach it. And I so love your final thought, that “most trouble can be simple learning moments instead of times of drama.”

By: Rosa Say

Rosa Say — Sat, 14 Nov 2009 01:24:44 +0000

I loved the picture too Rich, seemed so perfect!

Managers will hesitate at times fearing their words will get them in more trouble than their silence will, and I really disagree, for as you have described, we leave way too much up to error or assumption-riddled interpretation. Let’s face it: both can be messy, but trying to articulate necessary discipline well is worth the effort (and the practice!)

Thank you for commenting Rich.

By: Fred H Schlegel

Fred H Schlegel — Sat, 14 Nov 2009 01:01:50 +0000

Avoiding confrontation is a lose-lose in so many ways. I’ve been in situations where a manager avoided discussing perceived problems with a subordinate for so long that the frustration was raised to the point of threatening the persons job – meanwhile the subordinate had no idea they were ticking folks off. Dealt with quickly and fairly, most trouble can be simple learning moments instead of times of drama as you say.

By: Rich G.

Rich G. — Thu, 12 Nov 2009 21:02:09 +0000

Great picture to go with the article. Tacit approval really is a big one, and it’s the one that spreads so bad and so impacts working relationships. If I ignore it when Mongo comes in late but don’t ignore it when Roy does does this mean I’m playing favorites with Mongo or discriminating against Roy? Ugh… it’s a horrible can of worms and I can’t tell that it ever ends well for anybody. It’s messy and makes more work than it avoids in the long term. Nice article.
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